The Invisible Scars

When entering into a military relationship you are well aware that things will never be easy. Spending long periods of time apart, having your loved one in harms way, and even raising children alone while your spouse is away. These are all things that you have come to expect, things that civilians even know happen in the military life. We have no problem calling up any of our friends or family to talk a out these challenges and struggles. We hang up the phone and put our jackets of courage and strength back on and continue to do what's needed of us to keep our family going. The day your spouse returns from a deployment you are so relieved to take that jacket off and replace it with your favorite shirt of happiness and love. It can become one of the happiest days of your life.

In Novemeber of 2010 my husband returned home from Afghanistan from his second deployment, praise God! It only took me a few days to realize that my jacket of strength and courage was still very much needed. As weeks went by it became very clear that something was very wrong- war had come home with my husband. There were so many things I expected whe I entered a military relationship, but I never saw this one coming. No one prepared me for the challenges we were about to face. Alcohol quickly became one of my husband's best friends, nightmares and lack of sleep left their marks daily, loud bangs on the wall from neighbors make him very uneasy, and crowds of people prevented us from pretty much going anywhere. My husband seemed to be in complete denial about what was happening and I felt lonelier than ever. Its a hard thing to explain, but when you are in a situation like this you don't think that anyone will understand. You don't want to call up your family or friends and make your husband look like any less of a man than he is to you. You see all the others that come home from deployment and they all seem just fine- or are they? Looking in from the outside you wouldn't have a clue what my husband was going through (this post is going to actually be a huge surprise to many of my friends and family members), and I can't help but think of how many other men this is happening to.

After months of denial, my Mom K. (my husbands mom) called me up and asked me what was going on because she knew in her heart that something wasn't right. It was easy to keep all of this from people since we live so far away from both of our homes. I am still to this day so thankful for that phone call because I knew it was time to ask for help- but never knew how to ask for it. My husband loves his Mom to death and she always gives him advice to lead him in the right direction- he respects her and really listens to what she has to say. I am so grateful for that! Her next phone call was to my husband and she demanded that he needed to get help.

Here we are a year later- many many psychologist and doctor appointments later. We are geared up with tools to help him cope and at times medicine to help with depression. Our marriage is stronger than I ever could have imagined- and our relationship with Jesus Christ is growing every single day. It has been laid upon both of our hearts that this didn't happen to us for no reason, this is our story that needs to be shared. And please, if you are reading this- share it with everyone you know, because you never know who it could help. If just one person reads this that is facing a war at home with PTSD, TBI, or depression we know that sharing our personal story is worth it. I want you to know; you are not alone. Do not be afraid to ask for help, do not be ashamed of these invisible scars, and most importantly know that you are a warrior- God has chosen you to carry this weight because you have the strength and courage to do so. I am praying for you- I am praying for the challenges you are facing- and I am praying that your experience brings you closer to God.

We are here for you, whether your spouse is facing these challenges or you yourself are struggling with PTSD, TBI,  or depression. If you need someone to talk with- send me an email triciakindred@me.com

"I Can Do All Things Through Christ Who Strengthens Me". Philippians 4:13

My Coke Rewards

I probably shouldn't announce this proudly but my household goes through a great deal of Coke products. I'm pretty positive my husband may have a small addiction (we're working on it). I'm sure you have seen different codes inside bottle caps and also printed on the inside of the coke boxes, but you never really knew what it was about. Well my dear friends, those little codes equal FREE stuff! I wish I would of payed more attention sooner, we could have earned a lot more! Thankfully one of my wonderful couponing friends told me I just had to join!
It's very, very simple. You should go to mycokerewards.com and register- you can even just simply use your Facebook account to sign up. Every time you get a code you visit the website and enter the code, that's all! There are all different prizes that you can redeem with your points- free soda, gifts, magazine subscriptions, etc. Different products are worth different amounts of points; 2 liter of soda- 3 points, 12 pack- 10 points, 6 pack of bottles- 18 points, 16 oz bottle- 3 points, and a 24 pack is worth 20 points.

I just got a free 12 month subscription of Better Homes and Gardens! Yay! So get started today!

Putting Text On Canvas

So thanks to my very favorite site of all time- Pinterest- I always have a ton of new ideas for things to create for our house. Let's just say before I discovered Pinterest our walls were very very bare and I pretty much had no sense of style in the rooms. I saw this beautiful canvas on there but it wasn't linked to directions- instead to some ones site where you could buy it. Well since you all now how frugal I am by now you know that this was out of the question! So I quickly came up with how to create it on my own and lucky me I bought 6 canvases from a friend for just $6- so this project basically cost me $1 since I already had everything else!

Supplies:
-Canvas (any size you want it to be)
-Your quote or text printed out on white paper
-Acrylic Paint
-Paint Brush
-Scissors

1. Paint your entire canvas with the color you want for a background and let it dry while you complete the next few steps.
2. I created the quote I wanted in word using word art- just one word per page so I could make it large enough to look proportionate on my canvas since I picked out a larger size. Print it out.
3. I then cut out each letter so that the entire out line was left on the paper- to do this make sure you only make a single cut from the edge of the paper to the letter and then cut all around the letter without cutting back out to the edge again. In this next picture you will see my first word 'HOW' is cut out. 

4.  Cut out all the words and arrange them on the paper on the canvas how you want your final look to be. I then took a piece of chalk and traced around each letter.

5.  Take your paint that you would like the color of the text to be and put some in a dish- I then watered it down just a little bit to give it a more distressed look.

6.  Paint each letter in and you're done!

All Is Not As It Seems

Before I start I want to send out a very BIG thank you to a couple of our very best friends; Jose and Cata- your encouragement and leadership make so many things possible in our lives. A few months back as a couple they decided to lead a small group of military families in bible study each and every week- although Jose wasn't sure he was cut out to lead the group he felt in his heart that it was important. I am so very thankful that he didn't let his fear stop him, because each and every week they prepare such a wonderful Bible study for all of these families. Every member of our group is now apart of our family (and it just keeps growing!), we are truly blessed.

With all that being said, this weeks lesson was eye-opening and its just too wonderful not to be shared. Our group is in the second week of a new study called "Twisting the Truth" by Andy Stanley (I very highly recommend it).

All Is Not As It Seems-

When we sit back and think about the world around us it can quite simply be overwhelming and frustrating at the same time. To me its almost impossible to watch the news anymore because things taking place around us are so evil and absolutely unbelievable. Sometimes stories will pop up that are too much to wrap your mind around- what explanation could their be to justify their actions? The only way that any of it can be justified is the devil- 'the schemer and deceiver,' as the book states.

The devil may not sneak into our own personal lives like he does with these people we hear about on the news, but he sure can make his way into our lives when we least expect it. I mean this is why he is so very good at it; his schemes and deceptions can start out as something very small and it unravels into something we never could of imagined happening in our lives. Think back in your own personal life- have you ever told a lie and it eventually turned into something that ruined friendships? What made you tell that lie in the first place? This question is very tricky for most of us because many of us have a list of reasons why we told the lie- we justify our actions. This is just simply the devil continuing his schemes and deceptions. We told that original lie because the devil worked his way into our life within a split second- we don't want to be labeled as liars so we continue with lie (once again the devil is winning) until we ruin a friendship or any type of relationship.

One verse in our study this week that really touched me was Ephesians 6:12, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." From this day forward for the rest of my life I believe that this is a verse that I will have to remind myself of daily. Our struggle is not against flesh and blood. Wow! When I am angry or frustrated with people in my life- I instantly become mad at them. Paul says that this surely isn't who we should be struggling with and blaming. The blame belongs to spiritual forces of evil- not your husband, not your friend, not your sister or brother, not your parents- not anyone except the forces of evil. Its always important to remember this; It's not just what you see.

How do we keep the devil from working his way into our lives- turn to Ephesians 6:10-18 and remind yourself of these verses often.

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord's people.

Now truly think about how you can protect yourself from twisted thinking.